The Prophecy of GROSS
by calvinhobbes1010
Summary: IT IS FINALLY FINISHED!
1. Prologue: Before the War

**The Prophecy of G.R.O.S.S.**

Chapter 1: Prologue: Before the War

As you know, Calvin and Hobbes started a club called G.R.O.S.S., thinking it was all for fun, but they didn't know that it would eventually change the human race forever.

In all of Calvin and Hobbes adventures, they never grew older.

Calvin stayed at the age of six, and Hobbes was quite young also.

So, in this adventure, the same rules apply.

Calvin and Hobbes had meetings discussing all the things that went on with the struggle against the enemy, **_GIRLS_**.

They did not know that the sane things went on around the whole world.

There were millions of G.R.O.S.S. clubs consisting of boys who despised girls in many ways.

They all had the same goal, Get Rid Of Slimy GirlS (hence the name G.R.O.S.S.).

There would be many fights in the world between boys and girls, but nothing like the one that was to come.

How did this fight start?

Well, suddenly, girls found out something that would be crucial to prophecy.

What is the prophecy?

Well, many years ago, the wise people of the world had a sort of "meeting".

This meaning was when the prophecy would be created.

There were both men and women at this meeting.

Every wise one at the meeting agreed that the peace between the boys and girls would eventually come to an end.

All the wise ones predicted that one day there would be a war between both the boys and the girls.

And so, the prophecy was created, and it stated that the peace between boys and girls would come to an end and there would be a war.

So the weakness of the boys was very crucial to the prophecy, because it would cause disturbance between boys and girls.

The girls thought "what could be the most important things to boys?"

Well they thought and thought, and finally discovered that T.V., video games, and junk food were very important to boys.

So what would happen if they took these things away from boys.

Then, all the girls that despised boys joined a group called the Pretties.

The Pretties didn't stand for anything, but instead of being disgusting and calling themselves something like G.R.O.S.S., they decided to be the opposite and be beautiful, so they were named the Pretties.

But when the war started, there name changed to the P.A. The P stood for Pink (because the main color of girls is pink), Pretty (because they thought themselves to be beautiful, and Powerful (because they thought they were powerful).

And the A stood for Army.

So they were the Powerful Pretty Pink Army, or the P.A.

The P.A. decided to hold the President of the United States hostage, until all the video games, T.V., and junk food was sent away to Mars.

So this happened and the boys were furious.

All the G.R.O.S.S. clubs joined together to bring down the P.A. and get there precious things back.

So then the war began.

It began with water balloons, and soon you will see what the rest of the war was like.


	2. The War

Chapter 2:

The War

"Private Hobbes, get over here" screamed Calvin.

They were in a war room that was lit by a green light.

The war took place in what used to be Calvin's neighborhood, but during the war, all the houses were destroyed by either water bombs or slush-bazookas.

So the army's decided to move to a desert for a cooler looking landscape.

"The girls are advancing to our underground bomb shelter!" said Calvin.

"You mean the one that is full of our water balloons and slush balls?" asked Hobbes.

"No, the one that has our secret T.V. and junk food!" screamed Calvin.

"That's the last of the TV's and junk food left on the planet" screamed Hobbes.

"Yes, so send some troops down there to stop them!" said Calvin.

"YES SIR!" said Hobbes as he was saluting Calvin.

Calvin was one of the leaders of the G.R.O.S.S. army, along with the six other G.R.O.S.S. leaders (there was one boy representing their continent).

There was Yung-Yung Cho was representing Asia.

Calvin was representing North America.

Miguel Artega was representing South America.

Narwa Chi-Chi was representing Africa.

Australia was represented by Rohan Shalala.

Pierre Chason was representing Europe.

Antarctica was represented by Free Zing.

Together, all these leaders of G.R.O.S.S. led an army of about 2,500.

The P.A. was lead by only two people, Susie and her friend Candace.

The P.A. had about 2,450 girls in it, so there wasn't a big difference of people in the armies.

"Send your squad over to Bomb Shelter #6" Hobbes said to the leader of Squad #3.

"Sure think Private Hobbes" said the leader of Squad #3.

The weapons in the war were water balloon rifles, slush-ball snipers, slush ball bazookas, and water bombs.

The slush balls and water balloons were all kept cold in bomb shelters which were almost like freezers.

Squad #3 grabbed their guns and headed out.

After about quarter mile of walking the leader of the squad screamed "There they are!"

One of the Squad #3 soldiers was nailed in the head by a slush ball shot by one of the P.A. soldiers.

"Man down, man down!" screamed the leader.

"Head back to base soldier" said the leader to the hit soldier.

In this war, if you were drenched or covered in slush, you must return to base to dry off (instead of dying).

Then two P.A. soldiers were picked off by a slush-sniper.

"Two down, three to go" said the leader.

Squad #3 had 4 people left, and the P.A. squad only had 3.

One Squad #3 solider was hit in the stomach by a water balloon.

Then two P.A. soldiers were hit by water balloons.

"I want to capture this one and bring her back to base!" screamed the Squad #3 leader.

She fought and hit one of the Squad #3 soldiers with a slush ball, but Squad #3 finally got her to the ground and bound her with Cement-Silly String.

The remaining soldiers in Squad #3 dragged the P.A. solider back to the G.R.O.S.S. base.


	3. The Questioning

Chapter 3:

The Questioning

Calvin walked into a room with a lamp hanging over a chair.

In the chair sat a girl, who had sand all over her.

The girl was bound to the chair and there was a side table with a tape recorder on it.

Calvin hit the button on the tape recorder and the questioning began.

"What do we have here" said Calvin.

"I'M A P.A. SOILDER AND I'M PROUD OF IT MEAT HEAD!" said the girl, struggling to get out of her chair.

"Do you have a name?" said Calvin.

"No, once we join the P.A. we get rid of our identity and get a number" said the girl.

"Do you have a number?" asked Calvin.

"Yeah, it's P.S. #736" said the girl.

"What does P.S. stand for?" asked Calvin.

"Well the "P" stands for three different things: Pink, Pretty, and Powerful" said #736.

"And the S?" asked Calvin.

"It stands for soldier" said #736.

"So P.A. must stand for Pretty Pink and Powerful Army" said Calvin.

"Your smarter than you look Barf-For-Brain" said #736.

"Actually, my name is Calvin, Supreme Dictator For Life" said Calvin.

Then Calvin saw smoke coming up from behind the chair.

#736 had used a laser to cut the rope that bound her to the chair.

"What the..." said Calvin.

"DIE!" screamed #736 as she jumped up in the air, reaching to her back for her gun.

As she was flying through the air, Calvin said "Sorry, but your water balloon gun is right here".

Calvin shot 2 water balloons at #736 and she was hit in the stomach and knocked out of the air.

"Nice try" said Calvin.

"Now, since you won't cooperate, we'll just give you a little potion I like to call The Truth Telling Serum" said Calvin.

Calvin tipped #736's head back and gave her the serum.

"Now just talk to the tape recorder" said Calvin.


	4. PA's Plan

Chapter 4:

PA's Plan

"President Susie, they got Private #736" said one of the P.A. soldiers as she walked in.

"I wish I could just nail that Calvin with a dirt clod" said President Susie.

"What's a dirt clod?" asked the soldier.

"A dirt clod is a clump of dirt, before we used water balloons in the war, we used dirt clods to hit people" said Susie.

"THAT'S IT!" screamed Commander Candace.

"What's it?" asked Susie.

"We could use dirt clods, and attack Calvin with them" said Candace.

"What good will that do?" asked Susie.

"Well, I just found an underground passageway that we could use" said Candace.

"What does that have to do with dirt clods?" asked Susie.

"Well, it would be to difficult to carry water balloons and water guns through the narrow tunnels, but if we used dirt clods, we could just pick them up at the end of the tunnel" said Candace.

"That's it" exclaimed Susie.

"The G.R.O.S.S. won't know what hit them" said Susie.

"And I just found out that there is one tunnel that leads directly below the G.R.O.S.S. base" said Candace.

"Where are the tunnels" asked Susie.

"I think there is one right," said Candace as she searched threw the dirt "here, and Candace brushed off some dirt and there was a sewer lid.

"We're gonna go threw a sewer?" asked Susie.

"No, these things have been dried out for years" said Candace.

"Phew" said Susie.


	5. A Plan Discovered A Big Battle

Chapter 5:

The Plan Discovered/ A Big Battle

Private Charley Wickles peered into the window of the P.A. base.

He saw the girls drawing on the blackboard.

There was a picture of a sewer with girls crawling through them.

"Oh my gosh their planning an attack threw the sewers!" said Private Wickles.

He began to run back to the G.R.O.S.S. base.

"CALVIN, CALVIN" screamed Wickles as he was running towards the G.R.O.S.S. base, waving his arms in the air.

Wickles burst threw the doors.

"The P.A., they're, they're, they're" said Wickles, out of breath.

"They're what, SPIT IT OUT" screamed Calvin.

"They're planning an attack threw the sewers" said Wickles.

"Well lets send out two squads and fight to gain control of the sewers" said Calvin.

"HOBBES, SEND OUT SQUADS 5 and 6" screamed Wickles.

* * *

"Okay, Candace, are the soldiers ready for the ambush?" asked Susie. 

"YES SIR... I MEAN M'AM" said Candace.

Susie glared at Candace.

"Okay troops, now you are going to go through the sewers and ambush the G.R.O.S.S. base" said Susie.

They walked over to the sewer, opened the sewer lid, and the soldiers stood there, waiting for commands.

"GUNS READY" screamed Candace.

"MOVE IT MOVE IT" said Candace as she was waving her hand around, signaling for them to go into the sewer.

* * *

"Okay everyone, into the sewers, and stay alert" said Hobbes. 

All the soldiers went into the sewer.

"Are the soldiers in place" asked Calvin on the walkie-talkie.

"YES MA'M... I MEAN SIR" said Hobbes.

The soldiers got their slushballs and guns ready.

"I HEAR THEM COMING" screamed one of the soldiers.

The soldier who said this was instantly shot down, and that was the last thing anyone could see.

There were slushballs and water balloons flying everywhere.

The girls on the outside of the sewer could here all of the fighting.

They couldn't resist, so all the rest of the P.A. army went into the sewers, leaving the base uguarded.


	6. A Strange Suprise

Chapter 6:

A Strange Surprise

"CALVIN" screamed a soldier named Harry Potter.

"What... wait, aren't you from a book" asked Calvin.

"Yeah, the wizard world got pretty boring, so, I read your comic book, and heard that you were having a war with girls, so, I decided to join your army" said Harry.

"Oh, well, what were you about to say" asked Calvin.

"ADVA KADADVRA" screamed Harry Potter, as he pulled out his wand.

"WHOA" said Calvin, as he dodged the spell.

"You're a traitor" said Calvin, and he pulled out his water balloon gun.

"Your right" said Harry, but then he pulled off a mask, revealing Susie's face.

"What the..." said Calvin.

"Yes, it's me" said Susie.

"How did you do that spell" asked Susie.

"It wasn't a spell, it was just my amazing special effects crew" said Susie, and there were some nerdy guys standing behind her, waving.

"SAY HELLO, TO MY LILL' FRIEND" screamed Calvin, as he pulled out his water balloon gun.

"Hi little friend" said Susie, as she was petting his gun.

There was an utter silence.

"I didn't mean to really say hello to my friend, it was just from a movie, see , I was supposed to shoot you after that" said Calvin.

But then, Calvin could see nothing but slush.

"I knew what you meant you meathead, that was just a distraction" said Susie.

"But so was this" said Calvin, as he pulled out his snowball gun and shot Susie with it.

"HA" laughed Calvin.

But then he was hit with another slush ball and sent flying backwards, skidding on the ground.

"I'll get you for that".

"I'm sure you will" said Susie.

"PREPARE TO..." screamed Calvin, as he jumped in the air.

"Wait, got to reload" said Calvin, freezing in midair as if he had paused the fight.

"OK... DIE" screamed Calvin, but he was shot out of the air with another slush ball.

"Man I just can't win" said Calvin.

"You're right" said Susie, but then she was plastered with a water balloon.

"That, was for lying to me that you were Harry Potter.

Then suddenly, he felt a gun pointed to his back.

He turned around, and saw the whole P.A. army with their guns pointed to his back.


	7. Switching Bases

Chapter 7:

Switching Bases

"HOBBES" screamed a soldier to Hobbes.

Hobbes turned around.

"What is it" said Hobbes.

"The P.A. base, it is unguarded an unoccupied" said the soldier.

"Gather everyone up and let's go" said Hobbes.

* * *

"GET DOWN ON YOUR HANDS AND KNEES" said Susie to Calvin.

"I'd never bow down to y..." said Calvin, but he was interrupted by Susie's foot in his face.

"OW, THAT REALLY HURT" said Calvin, and he was kicked again.

"It was supposed to hurt" said Susie.

* * *

All of the G.RO.S.S. was charging at the P.A. base.

"I wonder why they would leave it empty" said Hobbes as he was running.

Then, a voice came in on his walkie-talkie.

It was Calvin, and he was whispering.

"Hobbes, I need some help" said Calvin.

"Where are you" asked Hobbes.

"I'm tied up in my own base, where are you?" asked Calvin.

"We're heading for the unguarded P.A. base" said Hobbes.

"Get there quick, and prepare for a big battle" said Calvin.

"Why" asked Hobbes

"Because the P.A. are heading for the base" said Calvin.

Then, there was a lot of static on the radio, and Susie's voice came in.

"I heard some talk about the you guys heading for our base" said Susie.

Hobbes didn't say anything.

"We'll just head back to your base and take control of that" said Susie.


	8. The Flagship

Chapter 8:

The Flagship

The G.R.O.S.S. was looking around the old P.A. base, but now it was known as the new G.R.O.S.S. base.

There was a group of people repainting the walls (which were pink).

Then, there was a yell.

"HEY, I THINK I FOUND SOMETHING OVER HERE" said this boy named Ifoundsomething.

"What is it" asked Hobbes.

"I think it's a trapdoor" said Ifoundsomething.

"Well let's open it up" said Hobbes.

They pulled open the door and found a spiral staircase.

"Who wants to go down the creepy looking staircase" said Ifoundsomething.

"Me and Squad #9 will go down there" said Hobbes.

"SQUAD #9 GET OVER HERE" screamed Hobbes.

He explained what they were doing, and began their trip down the narrow staircase.

"Guns at the ready" said Hobbes.

Suddenly, there was a noise, it was glass shattering.

"What the heck was that" said one of the soldiers.

They shot over where the noise was, and there was a yelp.

Hobbes found a light switch and flicked it on.

It took a few seconds for the light bulbs to go on, that means no one has been down here for a while, or the person just used a flashlight,

They found a P.A. soldier on the ground, and a shattered light bulb on the ground.

She had been trying to replace the bulbs.

"Sir, why aren't those lights on?" asked one of the soldiers.

Hobbes went over to one of the other light switches, and no one could have guessed what they were about to see.

The lights went on, and at the same time, everyone's jaw dropped.

"OH MY GOSH" said Hobbes.

"What is it?" asked one of the soldiers.

"It's a huge flagship" said Hobbes.

Hobbes took his radio and hit the talk button.

"Calvin, you'll never believe what we just found" said Hobbes, but there was no answer.

"Calvin, come in" said Hobbes.

"Calvin is not here right now, he is about to undergo Russian Water Torture" said a voice on the other end.

"I thought it was Chinese Water Torture" said Hobbes.

"No, Russian Water Torture is when you put a glass of water in front of a person who is tied to a wall" said the voice.

"WE HAVE TO GO SAVE CALVIN" said Hobbes.

"But we'll never make it in time" said one of the soldiers.

"Not if we use the flagship" said Hobbes.

"We need to gather everyone up and get them on the flagship" said Hobbes.

"But we could come right back" said one of the soldiers.

"We're gonna head to Mars after we save him" said Hobbes.


	9. Battleing to Rescue

Chapter 9:

Battling to Rescue

All of the GROSS was on board the flagship.

They had named the flagship King GROSS VII (instead of the Queen Mary II).

They were flying really slowly (which was actually very fast compared to a car) towards there own base.

"40 yards away sir" said the radar man.

"A little closer" said Hobbes, who was driving the flagship.

Then suddenly, the flagship took a drop, colliding with into the GROSS base's left side.

"Move out, move out" said Hobbes.

They began to charge through the corridors of the base.

Everyone was shooting, and everyone was being shot at.

"ANYONE WHO IS HIT GO BACK TO THE FLAGSHIP" said Hobbes.

Susie and Candace were sitting in the battle room of the GROSS base, listening to the room monitors.

"They found the flagship" said Candace.

"They must be planning to fly to Mars" said Susie, in a very upset tone.

"We can't let them get away" said Susie, "Tell Squads 4, 5, and 6 to board the flagship, shooting anyone in their way".

The squads began to move.

Hobbes and Squad #2 had found the room Calvin had been in.

"Water, water, water" said Calvin, sounding hypnotized.

"Get him out of here" said Hobbes.

A voice came in on Hobbes' walkie talkie "Hobbes, the girls seem to be boarding the flag..." said the voice, but then there was the sound of a water balloon hitting him.

"Oh shoot, hurry men, we have to get back to the flagship" said Hobbes "Squads 1,3,4,5,6,7,8, and 9, hurry back to the flagship" said Hobbes on his walkie-talkie.

They began to run threw the hallways, Calvin, begging to be himself again.

"HURRY, PREPARE TO FIGHT FOR ALL THE TV'S AND JUNK FOOD ON MARS" screamed Hobbes as they were running.

They were stunned when they saw all of the P.A. boarding the flagship.

"FIRE AT WILL" screamed Hobbes, and thousands of water balloons and slush balls flew at the flagship.

The results were devastating.

The boys didn't know that almost half of the water balloons and slush balls were flying at them (so they were from the girls), and the boys were right on target with the girls.

The remaining boys began to charge into the flagship as the girls were reloading.

There were water balloons and slush balls flying everywhere, girls and boys falling to the ground.

Then suddenly, Calvin and Hobbes led a group of about 150 boys to this very big escape pod in the back of the flagship.

But then there was a yell.

"THE GIRLS HAVE GIVEN UP, THEY ARE LEAVING THE FLAGSHIP, HURRY BACK" said a voice.

The group ran back and boarded the flagship.

Then they were flying in space.

There had been about 300 girls hiding inside a room in the flagship, but there was no sign of Susie or Candace.

They landed on Mars.

The boys and girls on the flagship had formed a peace.


	10. Epilogue: On Mars

Chapter 10:

Epilogue: On Mars

The flagship landed on Mars.

"WE'RE HERE" cheered everyone.

They all began to run towards the junk food and TV.

The girls had also sent up some normal food (such as corn, chicken, meat, and all other stuff).

The people who never got on the flagship found a rocket ship, but Susie and Candace never found out.

So everyone was on Mars, except for Susie and Candace.

Susie and Candace kept on planning to get to Mars, but all their plans failed.

So they went on to their normal lives.

And everyone who fought in the war (except for Susie and Candace) had a great life on Mars.

_The next chapter will be a preview of the new fic. The Life of Calvin: A Documentary_


	11. Bonus Chapter

**THE LIFE OF CALVIN: A Documentary**

**By calvinhobbes1010**

Chapter 1:

_October 25th 1999: 12:00 A.M._

As I sit here at my desk, I am writing about the life a very hyperactive boy, named Calvin.

Oh, and me, well I am Delvin, Delvin Sachanbbo.

You really don't want to know about me.

All I really have to say about myself is my middle name is Hiate.

I know, it is a very strange middle name, but oh well, now onto Calvin's life.

Calvin does not know I am writing this.

I have set up cameras everywhere he goes, in his room, all over his house, even at his school.

Please, if you read this, do not tell him.

Now, onto day 1.


End file.
